I stole this from another blog

But since it was a quote by an Apostle of our church, I guess it's not really stealing (which is a good thing because our church frowns upon the kind of thing). But the quote was so good that I wanted to post it here. The blog I got it from is Inky Smiles; she does a thought every Thursday and I always look forward to them.

"Hope is not knowledge, but rather the abiding trust that the Lord will fulfill His promise to us. ... It is believing and expecting that our prayers will be answered. It is manifest in confidence, optimism, enthusiasm, and patient perseverance."In the language of the gospel, this hope is sure, unwavering, and active. The prophets of old speak of a 'firm hope' (Alma 34:41) and a 'lively hope' (1 Peter 1:3). It is a hope glorifying God through good works. With hope comes joy and happiness. With hope, we can 'have patience, and bear . . . [our] afflictions' (Alma 34:41)."

~ Dieter F. Uchtdorf

All in Good Fun!

The Book of Mormon is a book of scriptures that we use in the church we belong to. That is why we are also referred to as the Mormon's even though the real name of our church is "The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints". If you would like to learn more about our church or have any questions feel free to email me at sourbonk [at] yahoo [dot] com.
I found this poem today and it was too cute not to share. Someone had left it by the printer at work. I found it online at about.com.
I hope those of you who know the stories in the Book of Mormon will get a chuckle out of this.

What if Dr. Seuss had written the Book of Mormon.
Nephi:
Of goodly parents I was born
I've never drunk, I've never sworn
This is Lehi, he's my dad
Laman, Lemuel, they are bad
And who is this? Why this is Sam.

Sam:
Yes, this is Sam; Sam I am

Laman:
That Sam I am, that Sam I am
I do not like that Sam I am

Sam:
In a tent, my father dwelt

Laman:
And it's so hot, I think I'll melt

Lemuel:
Our father's brain is out of whack

Laman:
Yeah, it's too hot, I'm going back

Lehi:
Then go and get the plates, my dear

Laman:
On second thought, I'm staying here

Nephi:
You said you'd leave and go away
Now all you want to do is stay?

Lemuel:
That Nephi always gets his way

Laman:
Here we are in this damp cave

Sam:
We would not be here if you'd behave

Nephi:
I will go and I will do
There's the angel, that's my cue
Laban's had too much to drink
Now he'll lose his head, I think

Nephi:
Look what I found, a brother from the quorum

Sam:
We will take him home, we will call him Zoram

Laman:
Our gold and silver we have spent
I do not like it in this tent

Lemuel:
I cannot read the Liahona
I must have drunk too much Corona

Laman:
We hate it here, we have no lives

Lehi:
Then go back to the city and get some wives

Lehi:
A tree, a tree, I see a tree!!
The fruit is white, the fruit is free!
A floating building, could it be?
Why do they laugh and stare at me?
Laman, Lemuel, come and see!

Laman:
We will not eat your precious fruit

Lemuel:
We will not wear a tie and suit

Laman:
We will not help you build your boat

Lemuel:
We do not think that it will float

Laman:
No not this boat, it will not float
Not even in a shallow moat
I do not care what Nephi wrote

Lemuel:
We will not eat your fruit I say

Laman:
We will not eat it on a tray

Lemuel:
And we won't eat it in a tent
Not even if your clothes you rent

Laman:
We'd rather have a can of spam

L&L:
We will not eat it, Sam I am

Sam:
You do not like it, so you say
Try it, try it, and you may
Try it and you may I say

Laman:
Sam, if you will let us be,
We will try it, you will see

L&L:
Say, we like this fruit of life
Sorry that we caused such strife
You've saved us from an awful jam
Thank you, thank you, Sam I am!

Dinner with my dad

This week my dad turns 53! So on Sunday we went to my mom's house and had dinner with him. While we were there we got a few family pictures with my dad. Here are my favorites. Now I just need to choose one for our online profiles.
Josh didn't think he needed to be in them, but one of my biggest pet peeves it not having complete families in pictures. It drives me nuts. He is my family now and therefore is a part of my family. Well, that and he's just so fun to look at....

Pyro is feeling better

Pyro is finally feeling better today. She was groggy all day Friday and refused to sleep. That's funny, because if it had been any other normal day she would have slept all day. Poor baby, we traumatized her! But she did sleep all day yesterday and today her appetite has picked back up.

We were concerned about Zipper trying to play with her so we put our fireplace fence up and put him on the opposite side. He didn't like that. Last night we did it again because he was acting frisky and picking on Missy so we took Pyro to bed and put the fence up again. At about 1:00 in the morning he started to cry, and cry, and cry. He is such a mommy's boy! I finally took the fence down so he could come to bed with us. When our nephew was a baby and I would hold him, Zipper would sit at my feet and cry. He doesn't like to share me. It will be hard for him when we do get a baby.


I held Pryo so much this weekend. It was so nice. She just isn't the most loving cat and doesn't like to be held. But since she was so out of it I held her to my hearts content. That's how I know she feels better; she won't let me hold her now.

Touch of Faith

I have been looking for this picture for a few weeks now. A local store had a sale this weekend (40% off everything), so I went in and was determined to not leave without this picture. (I also bought some new books!)

Touch of Faith depicts a woman reaching through the crowd to touch the hem of Christ's garment. The story is told in Mark 5:25-34."And a certain woman, which had an issue of blood twelve years,
And had suffered many things of many physicians, and had spent all that she had, and was nothing bettered, but rather grew worse.
When she had heard of Jesus, came in the press behind, and touched his garment.
For she said, If I may touch but his clothes, I shall be whole.
And straightway the fountain of her blood was dried up; and she felt in her body that she was healed of that plague.
And Jesus, immediately knowing in himself that virtue had gone out of him, turned him about in the press, and said, Who touched my clothes?
And his disciples said unto him, Thous seest the multitude thronging thee, and sayest thou, Who touched me?
And he looked round about to see her that had done this thing.
But the woman fearing and trembling, knowing what was done in her, came and fell down before him, and told him all the truth.
And he said unto her, Daughter, thy faith hath made thee whole; go in peace, and be whole of they plague."

I used to think that I had that kind of faith. When we first started the fertility pills I just knew that if I could touch my Savior I would be healed and would be able to become a mother. I contemplated stocking church headquarters in hopes of catching a glimpse of our Prophet, knowing he too could give me the healing I thought my body needed.

I know now that wasn't meant to be. It doesn't make my faith any less, I've just had to refocus it elsewhere. I know that my Savior could heal us and make us parents, but He must be able to see something that I can't see and He knows when the time will be right for us to get a baby, for us to have a chance at being parents. While I was digging through my scriptures looking for this story I stumbled on a thought I wrote in there who knows how many years ago...

"Faith keeps us trying when otherwise we might give up."

At times I do want to give up. The waiting and uncertainty are so hard to deal with sometimes. Everyday I see people and I know I could be better parents than them. I would buckle my child up in the car, I would realize that if I am cold and need a coat than maybe they are cold too and I would not only put a coat on them but also their socks and shoes. I would make sure that they knew they were loved.

I get so restless thinking that maybe today our birth mother will find us. Maybe someday I will be a mother. Everyone in the adoption world talks about how it will happen when it's supposed to happen, but it's hard to wait on the unknown. I know someday my joy will be complete, but what am I supposed to do until then?

Surgery

I had to take Pyro to the vet today. She's had a lump between her shoulder for a while now and it was my first priority to get her to the vet with my now FREE Friday's! (That is great! I'm glad to have Friday's off again. To celebrate I slept in until 7:30, got up for 15 minutes and then went back to bed until 9:00. It was wonderful).

Pyro loves car rides so unless we take all the cats in for their shots, we let her ride in the back window. I prefer it that way too, because I am convinced she gets car sick if she can't see out a window.



This was the ride home. She didn't blink for the first 15 miles. Even after that all she really did was move her head a few times.

When we got home we tried to get her to lay on a blanket, but she kept trying to walk around. She would only get a step or two and then fall down. We tried putting her in a box, thinking that if she didn't have the strength to climb out she would sleep. That didn't work either. She ended up getting half way out and then before I could help her, gravity did the rest for her and she fell on the floor.

I feel like such a bad, mean momma right now...We finally decided that the best medicine would be daddy's love. Hopefully, the drugs will wear off soon and she will back to her ornery self. Wait, that is the plus side to this. I can hold her and she doesn't growl at me.

We have to go back in two weeks so they can take the stiches out. Zipper and Missy will be living outside for the most part until then.

A few updates

I finally did some major repair work to our BETA LDSFS online profile. I don't think I ever posted that it was online because I was so unhappy with the picture quality. For example, we had a picture of our kittens on their and when they re-sized it, it cut off two of their heads! There was a few other pictures where we were missing the top of our heads and other pictures were just fuzzy. I have finally fixed all of those pictures I was really unhappy with. I still want to get some new pictures of us in our float tubes this summer. The ones I have now were taken with a disposable camera, so they aren't the clearest picture.

I also just finished adding several things to our adoption blog. With our online profiles we are limited to how much we can type and we can only use 24 pictures. I just posted a ton of pictures on this blog and hope to add some more in the upcoming weeks. I am very happy with the changes I made there. If you see anything on that blog that doesn't look right like a spelling error or an ugly picture, please email me. I really want that blog to put our best face forward.

The biggest news (if you can even call it that), is that we may have finally had a legit birth mother contact. We still aren't sure, but it hasn't felt as phony as the others. It is actually a girl looking for her pregnant sister. I don't know if they have made an adoption plan yet, I think they are just exploring all their options. But it is still exciting to know that real people are looking at our profiles!

Crafty Tag!

The first five people to respond to this post will get something made by me!

My choice.
For you.

This offer does have some restrictions and limitations:
1. I make no guarantees that you will like what I make! (But I promise to put my whole heart into it!)
2. What I create will be just for you.
3. It'll be done this year. (10 months, I better get busy!)
4. You have no clue what it's going to be. It may be a story. It may be poetry or an article on properly cleaning your face before a masque. I may draw or paint something. I may bake something and mail it to you. Who knows? Not you, that's for sure!
5. I reserve the right to do something extremely strange.

The catch?

Oh, the catch is that you must re-post this on your blog and offer the same to the first 5 people who do the same on your blog.

The first 5 people to do so and leave a comment telling me they did win a FAB-U-LOUS homemade gift by me!

*Oh, and be sure to post a picture of what you win when you get it! If you don't post a picture, my feelings may be hurt, and I just might cry.

I copied this from Desi and Carlie. I am so excited to do this! oh, it will not be a story, it will defiantly be something handmade.

Go ahead, leave a comment. You know you want to! Just make sure you offer the same deal on your blog.

My not so secret admirers

Working the front desk at my job seems to have it's perks. Sure I have to deal with a lot of smelling, unsavory, or otherwise sometime annoying people, but there is always a few who do like me.

A few weeks ago we were busy so I had someone come up to help me. When I pointed out who was next in line, he declared he would wait until his "girlfriend" could help him and insisted the guy behind him go next. Then as he went to leave he told me to watch as he drove by so I could see his new trailer that he does his cooking stand out of. This guy also will always make sure my husband is still treating me right.

This week another gentleman presented me with a gift.
A jewelry box that he made himself. He does woodwork and he does a really good job. I insisted that I couldn't take it, that my husband would be jealous. But he was persistent so I accepted it and told him no more presents. He just grinned and said we would have to see about that.

I don't worry about these guys to much. They are old enough to be my grandpa's. I figure they are just lonely.

Oh, and that jealous husband I mentioned? When I called to tell him about my present he asked what it was. When I told him it was a jewelry box his response was, "Oh, good. You've been asking for one of those. Now I don't have to buy one." Yep, I love that man!

Check out this adoption blog

I am a BIG fan of the R House Blog. For starters her boys are just about the cutest EVER (look for their pictures in the left sidebar). The writer of the R House is a huge adoption advocate. Last week she is doing guest appearances by others who are in the adoption world. Every day was an AMAZING POST.

Click HERE to go to her blog or click HERE to just see her guest appearances. Or click on both, it really is a great blog.

Tuesday's post made me cry. A lot. The poem that he wrote for his mother...well I can't find the right word because awesome, amazing, wonderful just don't justify it. If you don't click on any of the links I have included today, please be sure to check out Tuesday's post and read it. To read more of his story on the R House blog click HERE.

Wednesday's post made me cry. I know the pain of infertility and just how much it hurts. I will NEVER know the pain that a birth mother goes through. They are such amazing people and I am sure that they will be in the highest degree of glory in Heaven.

Thursday's post made me cry. We don't have a birth mother yet, but I think of her everyday. I wonder if what she is doing, if she is okay, what she looks like... I pray for her everyday and hope the best for her.

Friday's Post and Saturday's Post is a two part post. It is long, but well worth reading. It's a birth mother story that just makes me want to cry some more. I hope that someday we can have an amazing birth mother like this person. I also hope and pray that we can have a great relationship like she shares with the family that adopted her baby

Sigh, I want so badly to be a part of the adoption world...

Testimony Meeting

I belong to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. On the first Sunday of each month our church has a testimony meeting during our Sacrament services. Basically that means that they open the podium up to anyone who wants to stand and talk about how the feel about the church. It is completely voluntary.

Today I wanted to get up and bear my testimony, but I was suffering from stage fright. I knew if I got up that I would end up crying. Now I am feeling guilty that I didn't follow my heart. Had I been brave enough to stand up this is what I would have said:

"The last two weeks I have prayed harder than I think I ever have and I have cried harder than I have in quite a while. I was so worried that my friend wouldn't get her baby, that the placement would fall through and that she and her husband would end up going home to an empty house. I begged my Father in Heaven to not let that happen, I pleaded and at one point I even tried to bargain. At times I wanted to give up hope, how could my prayers make a difference? I am just one person. But I couldn't let go of the hope I had inside. This had to work, it just had to.

I had forgotten just how powerful a prayer can be. At first my prayers were "how can this be happening, it's not right." Then it was "please, don't let this happen to them. Can't you see they need this baby." Finally after several days of praying my heart seemed to calm down and I knew that things would work out the way they were supposed to. I didn't know for sure that the placement would happen, I just knew that it would go according to the Lord's plan.

I know I wasn't alone in my prayers and we must have prayed hard enough because things worked out and my friend was able to take this sweet little baby home."

Transracial Adoption Conference

I debated about going to this, mainly because it is during the week, but I have decided to go. I need something to lift up my spirits and I hope this will help. I am sure it will be very informative and eye opening.

Chinese Horoscope = Wishful Thinking

Today I received a Chinese Feng Shui horoscope. I don't put any stock in these things, but I still do them because it's fun and sometimes it does hit the nail right on the head. I liked some of the "promises" of this one so I thought I would post it here.

1. Which is your favorite color: Red, Black, Blue, Green or Yellow?

Yellow

2. Your first initial?

S

3. Your month of birth?

January

4. Which color do you like more, Black or White?

Black

5. The name of a person that is the same sex as you?

***** (I think I will keep that answer to myself for now.)

6. Your favorite number?

Nine

7. Do you like California or Florida more?

Florida

8. Do you like a lake or the ocean more?

Ocean

9. Write down a wish (a realistic one).

I wish I was a mother...is that realistic enough?

Answers:

1. If you chose:

Red - You are alert and your life is full of love.

Black - You are conservative and aggressive.

Green - Your soul is relaxed and you are laid back.

Blue - You are spontaneous and love affection.

Yellow - You are a very happy person and give good advice to those who are down. Well, I do love to talk.

2. If your initials are:

A-K You have a lot of love and friendships in your life.

L-R You try to live your life to the max and your love life is soon to bloom.

S-Z You like to help others and your future looks very bright. As in bright that the lights will be on during the night because I will be feeding a baby?

3. If you were born in:

Jan-Mar: The year will go very well for you and you will discover that you fall in love with someone totally unexpected. Does that mean there is an adoption in the horizon...

Apr-Jun: You will have a strong love relationship that will last forever.

Jul-Sep: You will have a great year and will experience a major life-changing experience for the good.

Oct-Dec: Your life will be great, you will find you soul mate.

4. If you chose:

Black: Your life is about to get better. You are more than ready for the change. Well some days I feel like it can't get much worse so better is something to shoot for. And you have no idea how ready I feel...

White: You have a friend who completely confides in you and would do anything for you, but you may not realize it.

5. This person should be your best friend...Um, I don't feel like a nice person right now. But I am going to work harder at being a nice person, especially to this person!

6. This is how many close friends you will have in your life time. Hmm, do I know all of those nine people yet? Somehow I don't think so, I can't wait to meet them!

7. If you chose:

California: You like adventure.

Florida: You are a laid back person. That is exactly why I chose Florida. See, these things really do work!

8. If you chose:

Lake: You are loyal to your friends and your lover. You are very reserved.

Ocean: You are spontaneous and like to please people. Wow, that sounds like me. I just want people to like me.

9. This wish will come true if you send this to 1 person in one hour.... YADA YADA YADA. Like that really makes a difference! But I can only hope, I figured I would get my best coverage by posting it here. But seriously, I could believe in these things until it gets to this point. How did good luck come about before mass emailings?

Here's the plan: I will have to remember to read this post a year from now and see if it actually worked. Of course if it's like the past year, when I look back I will still see the same empty house... Come on horoscope, don't fail me now!

I feel pretty, oh so pretty...

My mom won a free makeover with a Mary Kay Consultant. I have a family member who also does Mary Kay and I am not big on makeup, but I knew it would be a fun night so I went along. To start the night out I had to fight my brother's cat, Alto, for the chair. We started with a Satin Hands Treatment. I LOVE THIS STUFF! Misty described it best when I bought it. Your hands feel so soft, just like sleeping in silk pj's with fresh shaved legs! After that we washed our faces. We were all pretty busy so I didn't get pictures during that part.

Then we did the makeup. I don't wear makeup. I think it's a waste of time and money. I never learned how to use it when I was younger and and never really bothered with it. Oh, there's been a few times during our marriage that I've worn it, but really all I use is a little eye liner and mascara.

We started with foundation. I don't like foundation. I felt like my face was dirty and I wanted to wash it off. We thought powder would be better because I think my skin is a little oily, but I might try some liquid foundation if I end up buying anything.

This is my sister doing her makeup. She was the only one wearing makeup when we got there so she had to wash hers off first. She looked pretty before and after the makeover night.

I told her I wouldn't use this picture, but every time I see it I can't stop laughing. Her eyes look so funny! She LOVED the mascara.

Here is my mom doing her makeup. She ended up choosing some great colors.

Ah, what a disaster. I was trying to follow the guide, but I did it wrong. My eyes looked so scary! The gal tried to fix it, but it was still noticeable so I was able to use the makeup remover too!

See, here she is trying to correct me. I told her I didn't know what I was doing. I'm sure she was thinking "What kind of girl doesn't wear makeup." Um, me.
She was a great consultant. It defiantly looked much better doing it her way.
Despite the fact that I still don't know if I like how it turned out, it was a great night. I want every one's honest opinion. What do you think? Should I try to find the lady in me and start wearing more makeup?
Josh's thoughts? He thinks I look good either way. He has actually told me this several times. Last summer they did some work on a house and he would come home and tell me he was grateful I didn't look like that lady without makeup. He says some people need makeup to look good or their face is scary, but he says I am not that way.

Tada... the finished product

Last week I started my crocheting class. I worked all week on my bookmark, but when I got to the end I didn't know how to finish it off, so I set it aside and made a few hot pads. Tonight I learned how to finish it off, and I have already started a second one. I want to do this pattern several times until I get it down before I start something else.
It looks so nice in one of my favorite books!

I don't feel like I have blogged much lately, but I am trying to work through some emotional issues right now. I have had a hard time recovering from the con artist call we received two weeks ago. I just don't understand why people would do such a mean and horrible thing.

Then to top it off I have a few friends going through a rough patch right now. I am excited that I have an infertile friend that I can talk to when ever I want rather than just through my support group. And my other friend was supposed to get placed with her baby a week ago. I check my email 50 times a day hoping to hear good news from her. I am praying nonstop for her and her husband and the birth family of the baby. I just feel like I could feel better about adoption if I could see it go well for her.

Make sure to check out my cooking blog!

This weekend I made Oatmeal Craisins Cookies for Josh. This one is about the 30th he has eaten in the last 24 hours. The recipe is on my cooking blog.

Ready for Spring

Don't get me wrong. I actually like winter, more so than summer. I love snow. But when it is just cold and without any snow, I don't like that.
Oh, and yes I have time to blog being as I just finished Daydreams. It was so good. Once again Marcia Lynn McClure has outdone herself. My only complaint is the book was too short, but I always think that about all her books.

Don't call me this weekend...

I will be so engrossed in my new books that I don't think I will bother to answer the phone. I love Marcia Lynn McClure so much. A new book from her is better than Christmas and I have 2 new books. I'm so excited that I don't know what to do. Oh wait, yes I do. I started Daydreams while at lunch and I am already at page 75.

Crocheting 101

A few ladies in our ward started a Crocheting class. I am so excited. Several years ago I made hot pads, but that was all I ever figured out how to do. Last night was our first night and I started a bookmark. I can't wait to see how it turns out. This is how far I made it last night. I had to undo my stitching a few times, but by the time we quit I was getting the hang of it.

The lady who is in charge made us these cool little bags. You put the hook inside and then run the string through the Velcro and that holds your spot so your work doesn't come undone.

I didn't make this one. but this is the final project that we hope to have.

Pillow Fight

When I first got Pyro as a kitten she wouldn't sleep with me. She just wanted to play. So I would trick her into staying. I would put a pillow on the bed above my head and while she was on it I would scratch the bed to keep her attention until either she or I feel asleep. It seemed like a great idea then.
Now we fight over who should get my pillow. When we were first married I would wake up several times a night to find her on my pillow and my head on Josh's pillow. She doesn't kick me off my pillow as much as she used to, but as soon as I get up each morning she makes herself comfortable.