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Thanks Christine! I love it!
Do you think we are having a boy or a girl?
Monday, February 8, 2010
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
You'll be a great mom
Recently I've been thinking about the above statement. I've heard it. A LOT. I've been thinking of some of the insensitive things people have said over the years as we've struggled with infertility, and for me, this one bothered me the least. It implies that we should remain hopeful, but when said it doesn't actually say "oh, just wait, you're time will come."
"You'll be a great mom." What does that really mean and why do people say it all the time? I know I'm just as guilty. I say it to people and I say it about people. I have friends who are recently married and I know when they choose to start their family, they will be good parents. I have single friends and I know they would be good parents. But when I say that, what am I really saying. When someone says it, what do they mean? What do I mean? Well, basically I guess I mean "I believe you won't starve or beat your children and they will grow in a loving home."
As it's been said over and over since we married, I have never doubted those people. I think I'll be a good mom. I know I'll do my best to raise my child with love. I'll give them a good home to live in and try to surround them with what is good.
But when your birth mom tells you she thinks you'll be a good mom, those words take on a completely new meaning. When she says it, she means it from the bottom of her heart. A birth mom chooses you because she believes that you will be good parents to the child she loves. That act on her part also makes her a good mom. Adoption is all about being good moms (and dads).
Thank you Celeste for believing we will be great parents.
As it's been said over and over since we married, I have never doubted those people. I think I'll be a good mom. I know I'll do my best to raise my child with love. I'll give them a good home to live in and try to surround them with what is good.
But when your birth mom tells you she thinks you'll be a good mom, those words take on a completely new meaning. When she says it, she means it from the bottom of her heart. A birth mom chooses you because she believes that you will be good parents to the child she loves. That act on her part also makes her a good mom. Adoption is all about being good moms (and dads).
Thank you Celeste for believing we will be great parents.
Thursday, January 21, 2010
Adoption thoughts to the undwed mother
Why is it that when people talk about adoption, they do so like it's a loveless act? Considering adoption DOES NOT mean the mother doesn't loves her child. Considering adoption DOES NOT mean the mother is trying to find a quick fix to her situation.
We used to think that birth moms were pretty cool, until we met Celeste. Then we learned we were wrong. Birth mom's aren't cool, they are AMAZING. The love a birth mom has for her child is a greater love then anyone can ever understand.
I have yet to meet a birth mom who says they placed their child because they didn't want to raise it themselves. More than anything in the world, a birth mom WANTS to raise their baby on their own. If it was just about them, they would. But when they learn they are pregnant, its no longer about just them, it's about the child they carry. The child they LOVE.
This month I seem to be even more passionate about adoption. Maybe it's because we have our own birth mom now, so any assault on adoption feels like a direct attack on my family. Why can't adoption be portrayed more positively in the media? And I don't just mean Hollywood. Movies get it wrong all the time, but so do books, magazines and newspapers. I read an article this week that has spurned all this anger. And yet, I know I shouldn't be this mad. It's not the person's fault that they are uneducated. It's not their fault they can't see adoption as the loving decision that it really is.
If I could talk to these people, this is what I would say.
Adoption is beautiful. Adoption is not about making a problem disappear. A birth mom does not place her child and then walk away and forget that child. They never stop loving that child. Adoption is about trying to take an ugly thing and turning it into something beautiful. As a single, unwed expectant mother, you probably never expected to find yourself pregnant and alone. Already that child is loved and depending on you. You don't make an adoption plan because you don't want the child. By making an adoption plan you show that you are a good mother because you are doing the best you can to give your child the best in life. Adoption isn't really about you. Adoption really isn't about me. Its about the child.
We used to think that birth moms were pretty cool, until we met Celeste. Then we learned we were wrong. Birth mom's aren't cool, they are AMAZING. The love a birth mom has for her child is a greater love then anyone can ever understand.
I have yet to meet a birth mom who says they placed their child because they didn't want to raise it themselves. More than anything in the world, a birth mom WANTS to raise their baby on their own. If it was just about them, they would. But when they learn they are pregnant, its no longer about just them, it's about the child they carry. The child they LOVE.
This month I seem to be even more passionate about adoption. Maybe it's because we have our own birth mom now, so any assault on adoption feels like a direct attack on my family. Why can't adoption be portrayed more positively in the media? And I don't just mean Hollywood. Movies get it wrong all the time, but so do books, magazines and newspapers. I read an article this week that has spurned all this anger. And yet, I know I shouldn't be this mad. It's not the person's fault that they are uneducated. It's not their fault they can't see adoption as the loving decision that it really is.
If I could talk to these people, this is what I would say.
Adoption is beautiful. Adoption is not about making a problem disappear. A birth mom does not place her child and then walk away and forget that child. They never stop loving that child. Adoption is about trying to take an ugly thing and turning it into something beautiful. As a single, unwed expectant mother, you probably never expected to find yourself pregnant and alone. Already that child is loved and depending on you. You don't make an adoption plan because you don't want the child. By making an adoption plan you show that you are a good mother because you are doing the best you can to give your child the best in life. Adoption isn't really about you. Adoption really isn't about me. Its about the child.
Monday, January 18, 2010
Josh's Wisdom Teeth
Never before did I think I would be willing to pay someone hundreds of dollars to do a surgery on a Saturday, but that is just what we did this weekend.
Josh has been having wisdom teeth problems. And when I say problems I mean, pounding migraines at all hours of the night where he thought it would hurt less if his head really did explode. There was some nights he would only get 2 hours of sleep. Sure, you could say it was practice for when the baby comes, but there is no way he could have cared for a baby while in that much pain.
I've been reassured that when I had my wisdom teeth pulled several years ago, I wasn't near as funny as Josh was this weekend. He said the only goofy thing I did is when the doc asked if I could see my husband I declared I could see both of them just fine.
Here are a few of the funny things Josh said and did on the ride home from the dentist.
Josh has been having wisdom teeth problems. And when I say problems I mean, pounding migraines at all hours of the night where he thought it would hurt less if his head really did explode. There was some nights he would only get 2 hours of sleep. Sure, you could say it was practice for when the baby comes, but there is no way he could have cared for a baby while in that much pain.
I've been reassured that when I had my wisdom teeth pulled several years ago, I wasn't near as funny as Josh was this weekend. He said the only goofy thing I did is when the doc asked if I could see my husband I declared I could see both of them just fine.
Here are a few of the funny things Josh said and did on the ride home from the dentist.
"That doc, he's okay. He's a good egg in my book."
He told me to pull into K-mart and buy a Wii (I had wanted to buy one the night before, but he talked me out of it.) When I told him we were no where near K-mart, he made a big circle with his arm (and almost feel out of the seat, thank goodness for seat belts) and told me to turn the car around and go get one.
He declared that we were NOT going to stop in Heber on the way home. (We were no where near Heber nor were we going to be.)
He declared several people he knows to be "up-tight." I was one of them.
He demanded I call his brother and tell him he was ready to go ice fishing, right that second.
When my cell rang and I didn't answer it, he got after me for ignoring phone calls. He also kept reminding me they left a voice-mail.
He compared some people to coyotes.
When they gave us the okay to leave, I noticed his glasses weren't with him. Josh noticed he was missing teeth and he wanted to know where they were, he was going to make a necklace.
In an act of what I thought was brilliance, I asked for a kitten. He asked me if I had met our last kitten and there was no way in Hades he was letting me get another kitten like her. I should have just gotten the kitten, because he can't remember telling me no.
Not all of his declarations were funny. He did get serious for a minute and declared that he hopes that Celeste finds a nice man who will take good care of her. I'm pretty sure it was during this part of the trip home he declared that I need to be more like her, and not be so up-tight.
He told me to pull into K-mart and buy a Wii (I had wanted to buy one the night before, but he talked me out of it.) When I told him we were no where near K-mart, he made a big circle with his arm (and almost feel out of the seat, thank goodness for seat belts) and told me to turn the car around and go get one.
He declared that we were NOT going to stop in Heber on the way home. (We were no where near Heber nor were we going to be.)
He declared several people he knows to be "up-tight." I was one of them.
He demanded I call his brother and tell him he was ready to go ice fishing, right that second.
When my cell rang and I didn't answer it, he got after me for ignoring phone calls. He also kept reminding me they left a voice-mail.
He compared some people to coyotes.
When they gave us the okay to leave, I noticed his glasses weren't with him. Josh noticed he was missing teeth and he wanted to know where they were, he was going to make a necklace.
In an act of what I thought was brilliance, I asked for a kitten. He asked me if I had met our last kitten and there was no way in Hades he was letting me get another kitten like her. I should have just gotten the kitten, because he can't remember telling me no.
Not all of his declarations were funny. He did get serious for a minute and declared that he hopes that Celeste finds a nice man who will take good care of her. I'm pretty sure it was during this part of the trip home he declared that I need to be more like her, and not be so up-tight.
I learned a new lesson about love on Saturday. The hardest thing I've had to do since we were married almost nine years ago was to walk out of the room when the doctor told me to. It took every ounce of strength I had to do it. I made it as far as the restroom where I crumbled. It is so hard to love someone so much and yet not be able to do anything to help them.
Sunday, January 3, 2010
A great post on infertility
A friend of mine wrote a beautiful post about serving infertile people. It has a touching movie on it too. Go check it out on Giving What I Am.
Thursday, December 31, 2009
Dear 2009
What can I say to 2009?
January was a bitter sweet month. Our nephew turned 2. He is at such a fun age. Growing so fast and learning even faster. So busy and so much to do. Why don't we have a cousin for you yet?
In February I got sick of the infertility blues and gave my blog a new name and a new theme. Oh, and you almost had us with that scammer.
I started a cooking blog. But most importantly, we celebrated eight wonderful years together.
In March Josh got a puppy. I named her Sage. Pyro had her first cancer removal surgery. I offered to join a craft exchange. (Gosh dang, I need to get those bookmarks in the mail!)
In April Josh took me to see "Phantom." That was fun. Hitting the deer with my car, not so much. Easter in St. George with my grandparents, that was fun too. Getting together with FSA is always fun.
In May we had to give a new rule to Zipper. I was able to meet several online adoption friends in person. Josh felt creative and built a bench. And I took a stand for adoption and wrote a letter to the editor.
June, I love your warm weather! We went craw dad fishing and we discovered Pelican Lake. More good times with our FSA buddies. And I got a new fridge! I wrapped up the month by babysitting the happiest little boy.
In July I reaped the rewards of babysitting that cute little boy, by catching the icky influenza bug from his family. Highlight of the summer was helping Preston catch his first fish! Josh took me hiking in the mountains (sometimes I still call it the death march of '09).
August is always my favorite month because its time for FSA Conference. It was a blast this year because we met so many friends. And what a busy month you were. Blowing bubbles with Preston was the bomb! The family reunion in the mountains was the best. And then we welcomed our newest nephew, Tyler, into the world. (But still no children for us.) I also learned that there is worse things then a dead mouse in bed, try a live bat in the house.
In September, FSA got together again. We took new family pictures at the farm.
October, you didn't get a lot of attention because, let's face it, up until the 20th, you sucked. So much so I couldn't even find the strength to blog about it (and I still haven't). But you had your shiny moment on the 20th when we received our first email from Celeste. And you did go out with a bang with my Halloween Dinner and Dallon coming home.
In November, I got back into my blogging groove when I took on the National Adoption Month challenge to blog about adoption every day. You reminded me how cruel life can be when you took my Missy away from me. I still haven't forgiven you for that. But you did melt my heart when we met Ally. (Why didn't you warn me about all the trouble she would find?) I had a few fun hours watching my little nephews. (When can I do that again?). The big thing was I finally clued people in about Celeste.
December, how can I ever repay you. I want to scream it from the housetops, "We were picked!" Quite frankly, the rest of the month was a blur because we have had our heads in the clouds. Celeste is wonderful, I've never met someone who loved their baby so much. She gives unselfish love a whole new meaning.
2010, our future has never looked so bright.
January was a bitter sweet month. Our nephew turned 2. He is at such a fun age. Growing so fast and learning even faster. So busy and so much to do. Why don't we have a cousin for you yet?
In February I got sick of the infertility blues and gave my blog a new name and a new theme. Oh, and you almost had us with that scammer.
I started a cooking blog. But most importantly, we celebrated eight wonderful years together.
In March Josh got a puppy. I named her Sage. Pyro had her first cancer removal surgery. I offered to join a craft exchange. (Gosh dang, I need to get those bookmarks in the mail!)
In April Josh took me to see "Phantom." That was fun. Hitting the deer with my car, not so much. Easter in St. George with my grandparents, that was fun too. Getting together with FSA is always fun.
In May we had to give a new rule to Zipper. I was able to meet several online adoption friends in person. Josh felt creative and built a bench. And I took a stand for adoption and wrote a letter to the editor.
June, I love your warm weather! We went craw dad fishing and we discovered Pelican Lake. More good times with our FSA buddies. And I got a new fridge! I wrapped up the month by babysitting the happiest little boy.
In July I reaped the rewards of babysitting that cute little boy, by catching the icky influenza bug from his family. Highlight of the summer was helping Preston catch his first fish! Josh took me hiking in the mountains (sometimes I still call it the death march of '09).
August is always my favorite month because its time for FSA Conference. It was a blast this year because we met so many friends. And what a busy month you were. Blowing bubbles with Preston was the bomb! The family reunion in the mountains was the best. And then we welcomed our newest nephew, Tyler, into the world. (But still no children for us.) I also learned that there is worse things then a dead mouse in bed, try a live bat in the house.
In September, FSA got together again. We took new family pictures at the farm.
October, you didn't get a lot of attention because, let's face it, up until the 20th, you sucked. So much so I couldn't even find the strength to blog about it (and I still haven't). But you had your shiny moment on the 20th when we received our first email from Celeste. And you did go out with a bang with my Halloween Dinner and Dallon coming home.
In November, I got back into my blogging groove when I took on the National Adoption Month challenge to blog about adoption every day. You reminded me how cruel life can be when you took my Missy away from me. I still haven't forgiven you for that. But you did melt my heart when we met Ally. (Why didn't you warn me about all the trouble she would find?) I had a few fun hours watching my little nephews. (When can I do that again?). The big thing was I finally clued people in about Celeste.
December, how can I ever repay you. I want to scream it from the housetops, "We were picked!" Quite frankly, the rest of the month was a blur because we have had our heads in the clouds. Celeste is wonderful, I've never met someone who loved their baby so much. She gives unselfish love a whole new meaning.
2010, our future has never looked so bright.
Temple Square
We got our second Christmas on Saturday when we went to see Celeste. We had a fun time, but learned we need to better prepare for the city. We were a few minutes late for the movie, not that it mattered because it was already sold out. I had to call a friend to find a restaurant (turns out we were piratically standing on it). The city sure is busy during dinner time, we never have to wait to get seated at a table where we live. But dinner was a blast, she even laughed when I called Josh a gay cowboy because he bought a purple shirt. We are so comfortable around her. 
We were able to get into a later showing of the "Princess and the Frog." It was super cute. I could fall in love with Disney all over again.
After that we decided to get lost in the city and go to Temple Square. I'm so glad the temple is big so even when you see it several streets away, you can get there. This was my first time using my new camera and I haven't figured out the settings yet so some of the pictures are blurry.
We were able to get into a later showing of the "Princess and the Frog." It was super cute. I could fall in love with Disney all over again.After that we decided to get lost in the city and go to Temple Square. I'm so glad the temple is big so even when you see it several streets away, you can get there. This was my first time using my new camera and I haven't figured out the settings yet so some of the pictures are blurry.
On the way back to her house we got really lost. Had no clue where we were. We thought about keeping Celeste, but we weren't sure where our home was either. But God is in all parts of the adoption process and through divine luck we found her house.
I get to go out again on the 22nd to learn the sex of the baby. I am so excited!!!! If Josh can't get the day off, than he says we will have to take another trip in January so he can see Celeste too.
Ally's first dive... and first bath
Christmas morning Josh woke me up to tell me the hilarious story of Ally jumping into the toilet. I didn't laugh. Instead I inquired to make sure he had washed her off and was informed he didn't. I found her on the couch, on his side of the couch. So back to the bathroom we went, but this time to the sink where she received her first bath and if she has her way it will be her last bath. 
Christmas 2009
For the Christmas holiday, I participated in another blog swap on Seasonal Swaperoos. I forgot to take a picture of the stuff I sent. Here is the picture of the stuff I received. Kirsti did a good job when I mentioned I really like snowman (and don't like Santa's). The Snowman tin had chocolates in the top and the snow flakes and hair clips in the second bin. There was a cute Christmas card telling us to use the picture frame next year for baby's first day in the snow. I can't wait!
Our tree on Christmas morning.
After opening presents. Don't worry, it was a bigger Christmas than it looked. I also got 4 new tire rims and two new tires. Josh got a kennel and a bed for his dog.
This year I had good intentions, I started my Christmas projects in Sept. But then I quit working on them in Oct. So on Christmas Eve I pulled an all nighter and stayed up until 2 AM finishing the scrapbooks I was making. I made Josh's mom and sister each one using Melanie's kids. Here is just a sampling of some of the pages.
Then for Josh's Grandparents I made a scrapbook for our family reunion this summer. I had a ton of pictures for it so I decided to do a different layout for it. 
Our tree on Christmas morning.
After opening presents. Don't worry, it was a bigger Christmas than it looked. I also got 4 new tire rims and two new tires. Josh got a kennel and a bed for his dog.This year I had good intentions, I started my Christmas projects in Sept. But then I quit working on them in Oct. So on Christmas Eve I pulled an all nighter and stayed up until 2 AM finishing the scrapbooks I was making. I made Josh's mom and sister each one using Melanie's kids. Here is just a sampling of some of the pages.
Then for Josh's Grandparents I made a scrapbook for our family reunion this summer. I had a ton of pictures for it so I decided to do a different layout for it. 
This is a tradition I talked about keeping, but that was before I realized just how in over my head I was.
We are so excited for Christmas next year. It is going to be big!
Wednesday, December 30, 2009
Modern Blitz Designs
I have a friend who makes the cutest cards. I'm talking Christmas cards, announcement cards, pass along cards. You name it, she can design it. She also does blog designs. The best part is all this work is for her dream of parenthood. They are looking to adopt and she is doing this design work to help raise money for their adoption plans. Check her website out at Modern Blitz Designs. Go there and check out her adorable work.
P.S. She is doing a giveaway right now.
P.S. She is doing a giveaway right now.
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