You'll be a great mom

Recently I've been thinking about the above statement. I've heard it. A LOT. I've been thinking of some of the insensitive things people have said over the years as we've struggled with infertility, and for me, this one bothered me the least. It implies that we should remain hopeful, but when said it doesn't actually say "oh, just wait, you're time will come."

"You'll be a great mom." What does that really mean and why do people say it all the time? I know I'm just as guilty. I say it to people and I say it about people. I have friends who are recently married and I know when they choose to start their family, they will be good parents. I have single friends and I know they would be good parents. But when I say that, what am I really saying. When someone says it, what do they mean? What do I mean? Well, basically I guess I mean "I believe you won't starve or beat your children and they will grow in a loving home."

As it's been said over and over since we married, I have never doubted those people. I think I'll be a good mom. I know I'll do my best to raise my child with love. I'll give them a good home to live in and try to surround them with what is good.

But when your birth mom tells you she thinks you'll be a good mom, those words take on a completely new meaning. When she says it, she means it from the bottom of her heart. A birth mom chooses you because she believes that you will be good parents to the child she loves. That act on her part also makes her a good mom. Adoption is all about being good moms (and dads).